Where are you from?
I'm American.
But are you Armenian? [i.e. of Armenian descent]
I'm American, clean American
But there are no clean Americans. What American are you?
American American.
Where are you from in America?
New York City
Are there many Armenians there?
Some.
I have a [cousin, friend, neighbor's niece, etc.] who lives in Californian. There are many Armenians there.
Yes, in Glendale?
Yes, in Glendale. Is it better here or there?
[shrug of shoulders]
Huh? Better there? Or here?
[shrug of shoulders]
But what are you doing here?
I'm an English Teacher.
Oh, an English Teacher, where?
If I'm in the region of my village:
In A_____
Which school? S____yan's?
Yes, A____ School #1.
If I'm anywhere else in the country:
In A_____, a small village near T_____
Where?
A small village, near T____, called A____
Oh., what do you get paid for this?
I don't understand
What kind of salary do you get?
I don't understand
Money? Money! How much money?
Normal money, a teacher's salary.
Are you paid by the school?
No, by my organization.
What organization?
The Peace Corps
What organization?
Peace Corps.
Oh, peace corps. Want a smoke?
No, I don't smoke, thanks.
[lights a cigarette] How old are you?
You tell me?
umm...23?
Nope
25?
That's right.
Are you married?
I'm not.
You'll marry an Armenian girl.
Maybe, if she speaks English.
Nevermind, she'll learn.
Commentary on the conversation:
I have the conversation, on average, about once a day. Some days I have it 5 or 6 times. The questions are simple and common, nevertheless they're a minefield of cultural differences and assumptions.
But are you Armenian?
I'm American, clean American
But there are no clean Americans. What American are you?
American American.
Race, Ethnicity and Nationality are, as any reputable late 20th or early 21st century sociologist will tell you, largely social constructs. "White" Americans tend to be blissfully ignorant of their racial and ethnic histories, and unaware of those around them, unless that person is obviously Hispanic, Black or Asian, in which case they are categorized into one of those excessively broad categories. For Armenians, however, "Belorussian," "German," "Swedish," "Italian," or "Jew" remain separate, distinct categories of ethnicity and nationality. The world used as a reference to a "pure" ethnicity is մաքուր (makur), which has connotations of both purity and cleanliness. [1] In America, associating these concepts with ethnic heritage is decidedly un-politically correct as it implies that a mixing of ethnicity is impure or unclean. I define myself primarily by nationality and consider my ethnicity rather vestigial. For me, the question is akin to "how large is your appendix?"
Yes, in Glendale. Is it better here or there?
[shrug of shoulders]
Huh? Better there? Or here?
[shrug of shoulders]
After a year, I still haven't formulated a response to this question that is both polite and truthful. I very directly ignore it.
If I'm anywhere else in the country:
In A_____, a small village near T_____
Where?
A small village, near T____, called A____
No one's heard of my village. Unless they have. In which case they probably know and are related to half the population of the town.
Oh., what do you get paid for this?
I don't understand
What kind of salary do you get?
I don't understand
Money? Money! How much money?
Normal money, a teacher's salary.
Most Americans aren't comfortable discussing their salary or the cost of their personal possessions with strangers. Most Armenians are.
Oh, peace corps. Want a smoke?
No, I don't smoke, thanks.
Almost all Armenian men smoke. A respectable Armenian woman does not.
25?
That's right.
Are you married?
I'm not.
You'll marry an Armenian girl.
Maybe, if she speaks English.
Nevermind, she'll learn.
I'm of prime marrying age.
[1] For example, to find out if water is good to drink or to swim in, one might ask "այս ջուր մաքուր է?" (Is this water makur?) and receive the response "հա, մաքուր է." (Yes, it's makur.)
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